As part of my attempts at self-healing from WTF, I am exploring Eastern mind-body healing arts. My acupuncturist recommended that I begin a Qigong (chee-gung) practice. What do you mean you’ve never heard of Qigong!? Just kidding. I hadn’t, either. I think it’s sort of a kinder, gentler Tai Chi. (I know, that explanation helps a lot, right?)
I told the fam the other night that I had received the Qigong DVD I ordered from Amazon, and intended to “do it.” LG asks, “You’re going to do what to a chick-ON?” She pronounces “chick-ON” like the chick on the old McDonald’s “chicken selects” commercial, where there are a bunch of teens in a car, saying, “Chick-ON!” And of course her asking that question means that we must all practice saying, “Chick-ON! Chick-OOOHHHHNNN!” I don’t think that’s the practice the acupuncturist intended.
Saturday, I finally popped in my DVD and recruited LG to venture into the world of Qigong with me. It was very enjoyable and stretchy. But LG pooped out mid-way through. She was looking for an escape, and seized the moment when the video guy said, “Now pretend you’re rolling a big ball of qi…”
“A big ball of cheese?! Did he say we’re rolling a big ball of cheese?!”
“He said, ‘qi.’ It’s spelled Q-I, and it’s pronounced, ‘chee,’ and it means . . . (I searched briefly for a short definition as I rolled my imaginary cheeseball and breathed) . . . energy. Qi means energy.”
“Qi is spelled Q-I, and pronounced ‘chee,’ and means energy. Cheese is spelled C-H-E-E-S-E and is pronounced ‘cheese,’ and means . . . Mommy, what does ‘cheese’ mean?”
“I’m old and sick and trying to do qigong and you’re asking me what cheese means?!”
“I’ll look it up.”
“You’re going to look up WHAT CHEESE MEANS?” stretch, breathe . . .
“I know what it IS, I just don’t know the definition of it. . . ”
I think my qigong practice is going to be a solo effort.
What Was I Thinking? 
*knows definition of “cut the cheese”*
Cheese is made from milk, which, like qi does a body good. Of course, I keep reading “qi” as “kwee”.
Energy? Ooohhh… I could use some energy!
Just reading this made me tired . . . I wish someone would roll some energy my way. 🙂
I know this post is funny, but from what I’ve seen and read abut qigong I’m glad you’re practicing it. Qi does mean energy. I’m guessing that LG understands the concept of foreign languages. Maybe that would help her not try to take it so literally.
Anyway, even thought qigong would be good for LG, too, I’m so glad you’re trying it. Let me know how it goes for you.
CHEESE!
Even though, not even thought.
sigh
Anything that makes you feel better is worth it. Even if it’s not easy to pronounce.
Susie, makes me hungry for Chinese, Che-kung Ha!Anything that can make you laugh and relax at the same time is a definite do.
Yes it’s the pronunciation that’s the killer – I need them written out phonetically.
Cheers
So… is this something you find fulfilling yet, an hour or so later, want to do again? You know… like Chinese food?
QI is such an excellent Scrabble word. I mean, so long as you’re the one playing it, that is. 🙂
They’re dissin’ your chee? That’s no gouda.
*sorry, I couldn’t resist.* 🙂
I have a second cousin who practices Fung Shui. She’s all about the QI. Of course, she needs all the QI she can get, considering she sounds like a strangled cat when she’s pissed. Which was often when her offspring was living in her basement. Eeep.
it might also be healthful to imagine yourself as wonderful as a big ball of cheese.
say it with me: “I am a tasty delight.”
I know a girl who practises “chick-on”. We call her Bucky.
mrB, you have such a mastery of the language.
ck, KWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! See what you made me do?
nina, sadly, I can’t help you with the energy. But I can make a very nice cheeseball. How’d that be? (Come to think of it, I’ve actually been accused of BEING a cheeseball…)
squirl, even thought makes sense, too. I think it will be good. It suits me. So far.
sandi, amen.
aprilz, I’m all for laughing and relaxing 🙂
maddy, yea, the people on the DVD say it a lot, so that helps with the pronunciation.
ck, yea; and it comes with fortune cookies, too. :p
karen, good idea. I’ll have to try that with my MIL, the Scrabble queen.
MoDis, I tried so hard to respond with a cheese pun, but no luck. Your auntie sounds like she could use a nice cheeseball, though.
cm, see, this is why I’ve missed you. “I’m a tasty delight,” is such a MUCH better cheese-analogy-affirmation than the one I have been using: “I’m old and I stink.” 😉
nils, yes, I hear Bucky is quite accomplished at “chick-on.” (From her, I hear that.)
Ah, but where there is “chick-on” there must also be “chick-off.” Otherwise, no second date.
(Susie, I never said I was “quite accomplished”…I believe the term I used was “Champion of bow-chicka-bow”)
Qi-Burger, Qi-Burger, QI-Burger. Pepsi. No Coke.
bucky, you’re right. My bad. CBCB. That was it.
william, you’re right, too! No lie, last night I told Jif I wanted food from Cheeburger Cheeburger. Coincidence? Or a product of the Qi movement?
William cracked me up.
Qibus, what a great post! And the title is fab.
This is soooooo qi-sy. Hey, come back here with my qi! That’s nacho qi!!
Oh dear. I’ll stop now.
Oh Susie, you have me in stitches 🙂
please tell me about chee.if is possible you can teach me to get che power
Hi Susie, I never heard of Qigong, but I have friends that do Tai Chi……I have been practicing saying Qigong, and I think I have it down pat…..Chick Onnnnnnnnnn…..
My friends husband went to China for a month for business, and he was learning Chinese….he would call and say knee how, and I thought he was saying meow…..and I would answer woof woof….until he told me he was saying hello in Chinese….LOL…. Foreign language is so interesting, and it sounds so different than it looks… does that make sense..?
Well Christmas is around the corner, and I don’t know if I will be back until after Christmas, so I want to wish you a very Merry Christmas, filled with NO PAIN…… judy
jim, you guys havarti used all the good puns! (heh heh)
shari, shari, shari, how do I love thee? Let me count the wheys . . . (Whey, that’s cheesy, right?) You remind me of hearing about one of LG’s teachers at the Fall Fling. She was operating the nacho stand, and she kept yelling at the kids, “I’m NACHO MAMA!” I don’t think they really got it, but it cracked me up; I’m sure she wanted to say that in the classroom a dozen times a day!
mainlinemom, I’m so glad you enjoyed. Very nice to see you 🙂
judy, woof! That’s too funny. Merry Christmas to you and yours, too. 🙂
If laughter were truly the best medicine, that little comedianne of yours would’ve had you all better long ago.
Love. Hugs. Prayers.
i hope the chick-on works for you. please keep us (me) updated. my former therapist recommended it to me months ago for depression and for my fibromyalgia….mainly because of the “energy” benefits and because it’s not so taxing on the body. naturally i’ve done nothing about it yet, but reading this reminded me. i’d be interested to know if it helps you……if so, i’d certainly be willing to give it a try.
your post, as always, brought a smile and lightening of heart.
my christmas wish for you is for this to be the last year of suffering through WTF….may it roll itself into a big ball (cheese will do) and roll away from you forever. merry christmas to you and your family!
This is so funny. Between chick-on, cheese and other LGisms there is going to be less deep breathing and more shallow guffawing. Your funny bone will get stronger, though.
I’ve never been involved with qigong, but have practiced tai chi since 1989. I can still do a bit of it even with the present state of my body. As with your experience with LG, I really need to be alone to do it. Alex too often wants to do tai chi, too. He gets under my feet, leaps at my hands, and makes his normal demands, like going out side, and expects me to respond immediately. Silly cat.
i want o get this power.how to get it? please teach me and help me.kindly tell me about this